Repeat, the Pies are GO!
They were stamped Fragile and Perishable and should be winging their way to CA Priority Mail. Wrapped in Bubblewrap, they should be fine. Lets see how they do.
As a bonus, in finding the closest Post Office, I also found a local Staples, Burger King, A&W, Laundromat, KFC and gym. Some of these may come in handy!
Sadly, however, local radio is so full to teh suxx0r that the best song I could find on the radio was some vaguely remembered tune about some chick who wants to lead "a glamorous life" and may or may not "need a man's touch". I couldn't really make it out and turned it off soon thereafter when I concluded it was also of teh suxx. Interesting (not necessarily good, but interesting) hook musically, but the vocals were so washed out I couldn't tell who it was.